Tired of being treated like a fat leper just because the smell of public transport disgusts you? Fed up with ‘red’ Ken taxing you to cruise downtown in your pimped up Nova?

Ken-FuckerWell now you can throw a LARGE HANDFUL OF SHIT at the Congestion Charge thanks to ‘Ken-Fucker’ - the revolutionary new Congestion Charge invisibility cloak.

“What the fuck is that?” I hear you cry.

‘Ken-Fucker’ is the gobsmacking fruits of a 10 year top secret collaboration between the finest minds in modern science: NASA, MI5 and Mick Hucknell.

Each unit comes with a hi-tech polyurethane sheet, lovingly hand-painted by specially trained pygmy ninjas. Once applied it seamlessly camouflages your car as an everyday road (complete with potholes, dogshit and pissing tramps). So what do the cameras see? Why just a car sized piece of road trundling do the road. TAX THAT!

So next time you drive into town simply stick ‘Ken-Fucker’ to your car with the pritt stick and eucalyptus gum provided and HEY PRESTO! You’re now totally invisible to fascist, wallet-hating Congestion Charge Cameras.

What better way to tell Ken to go fuck himself up the arse with a burnt out Lada? None.